Well... here we are at a milestone.
It's been six months since Breck and I got married.
We went to the temple this morning and I kept trying to figure out if I felt like it had gone by fast or slow.
I can't believe it's been six months, but it feels like I've been married to Breck for forever.
These months have been the best of my life.
The happiest.
The most fun.
The most exhilarating.
The most life changing.
I have had a revolution in the last six months.
Piece by piece I am getting better.
And Breck is to blame.
Sharing everything in your life with someone opens you up to learning a lot of lessons.
I have learned my fair share so far, and I hope there are many more waiting in the wings.
These lessons are probably obvious things that people already know.
But I didn't know them. Or maybe I just didn't believe it. Until the light bulb came on.
I haven't been able to stop thinking about all of these lessons lately. I have to share.
Even if it's just for me.
All of my life, I have had a hard time with acting. Not like the play kind. But doing something to change.
I have always had a laundry list of things that I didn't like about myself. The list was never ending.
Seems like I added something new everyday. All types of things; physical, personality, social, talents.
You name it. I felt like I wasn't good enough at it.
I was not depressed or anything of the sort. I knew I had value and I was happy.
But there was always this list in the back of my head nagging at me to be better.
I believe it is good to be aware of your weaknesses so that you can make them strengths.
There lies the key, SO YOU CAN MAKE THEM STRENGTHS.
And I was not doing that. The list was making me see myself in a lesser light than what I was.
I didn't see the strengths anymore.
Then I married Breck. And I noticed something about him that I hadn't really noticed before.
If he wants something, he does it.
Simple as that. It doesn't matter how hard it is, he figures out how to do it. He does what he wants.
Slowly, I realized that I was the only thing holding myself back.
I know my Mom and Dad are rolling their eyes right now because they told me this a million times.
But sometimes we just have to get there on our own.
Anyways, I've come to the realization that I can do hard things. I can be who I want to be.
My life can be exactly the way I want it to be. I just have to act. I have to do SOMETHING.
My life can be exactly the way I want it to be. I just have to act. I have to do SOMETHING.
This is such a simple thing. I know. But it has literally been life changing. Everything is different now.
The world looks different because I know I am capable of conquering it. Nothing can hold me back.
I feel like a whole new person. But still me. A better me.
That didn't make sense. And I'm getting really emotional, so it might not get better from here.
I just feel the urge to shout from the roof tops. I am invigorated. I am excited.
I am acting. I am working. I am improving.
I am changed.
And I'll forever be grateful for Breck. He doesn't even know how great he is.
Good thing he doesn't read the blog (he says he lives it....) so I can brag about him as much as I want.
I am the luckiest.